Headlong into the Chaos
Isn't it amazing how life seems to run away with us and we find that we're suddenly tossed into chaos? All the best intentions and pretty to do lists seem to achieve nothing sometimes. The past few days have been like that for me. I'm chalking it up to Friday's full moon... just don't remind me that it's already Wednesday and I'm now only getting my ass into gear.
Now chaos isn't exactly a state that I'm uncomfortable with. I thrive in true chaos and work best in organised chaos. Unfortunately when we give ourselves over to that chaotic state of mind, other problems tend to be quick to follow.
I know that my biggest battle during times of chaos is rampant anxiety. Not standard worry over things like finances and the like but full blown, paranoid anxiety... the kind of anxiety that has me wanting to barricade myself in a cupboard for the day just in case someone comes to my door.
There are so many tricks to overcoming anxiety but I think it's more important to be able to take a step back to examine the roots of our anxiety. Is it based in a fear that we carry around with us from childhood? Is it based in an experience that we are still allowing to affect us in a negative manner? These things are so often below the level of our consciousness and the only indication that there is something that needs our focus is that thrum of anxiety deep in the pit of our being.
I know that as I write, there are parts of me that bear examining. This is all about honesty, right? And if we stop working on ourselves then we stop growing. I'm lucky enough to have the tools and the support to overcome these obstacles but I would love to hear from you what your triggers are and how you deal with them.