6. May, 2018

How right is right anyway?

The toughest decisions we make in life are not between right and wrong. The toughest decisions are between what is right and what is right for us. There are times when what is right for us is deemed to be wrong by the people standing on the outside looking, by the people who don't know the depth of our story. 

In times like these we wage an inner war. I believe that most of us have a decent bit of humanity in us. What happens though, when humanity is challenged by self preservation? They say that those who have been through hell and come out kind and loving instead of hardened are true warriors and deserving of our respect. Where then, is the space for those who have gone through hell, come out kind and loving but also with enough self love to draw a line in the sand and refuse to climb on the bus with the same people who drove them to hell in the first place? I believe the greatest warriors of our time are the ones who pick the battles where they can make an impact instead of fighting battles that cannot be won. 

And this point is where we evolve from having a messiah complex and wanting to save everyone no matter the cost to having a healthy sense of self esteem and knowing that there are those who don't want to be saved and sacrificing ourselves for them only leads to being unable to help those who actually want our help and our love. 

How many of us have experienced relationships that were completely one sided? How many of us have experienced relationships which contained so much love but were toxic despite that? Sometimes love just isn't enough and sometimes we want someone to love us so desperately that we continue to run full tilt at the same brick wall until we fall down, battered, bruised and broken with a sense of hopelessness for our future.

When you breach the barrier of awareness and finally realise that it doesn't matter how many circus tricks you learn, you will never earn the love of somebody, you finally come to the realisation that it's time to stop with the tricks and turn that persistent, unstoppable energy in a direction that will improve your own life and possibly the lives of those around you.

And right there is where the decision between right and right for you comes in. Others will judge you. Stand tall, smile and allow them to do so because being judged for emerging from the darkness and stepping into your own self love is a small price to pay for the reward of an end to the sadness and drama. 

It's okay to do what is right for you. It's okay to love yourself. It's okay to decide for yourself where your energy should flow. And it's okay for others not to like. Fly your flag... the people who are meant to love and support you will stand shoulder to shoulder with you flying their own.