28. Jun, 2019

Alone or lonely?

There's such a huge difference between being alone and being lonely and all we have to do to see it is take a step back and look deeply. I think humans are pack animals by nature but, unlike most animals that congregate in groups, we actually do really well on our own too.

All this leads me to question my belief that we are meant to be in groups altogether. Is there a possibility that this is a case of nature versus nurture? We are raised to believe that the family unit is vital and that having heaps of friends is a good thing. And it is wonderful to have all that. Our real growth doesn't happen when we are surrounded by people though, does it?

Maybe one of the reasons we are so terrified of being alone is that we are, in actual fact, terrified of our own growth. The idea of becoming something so much more, of becoming someone who stands out in their difference is daunting. It flies in the face of the conformity that we are taught to strive for.

I can't help thinking that we add so much more value to society on the whole when we become that something more. Our aloneness causes us to dig deep, to analyse, to lose ourselves in introspection and it's often through that introspection that we morph into beings who are more compassionate, more kind and more real. We accept all of ourselves and in so doing, we learn to accept others too.

So revel in being alone... stop rushing to distract yourself with others and learn to love yourself right now, right where you are. You'll discover that being by yourself isn't lonely... true loneliness comes when you are surrounded by people who have no urge to understand your journey. So set out alone if you need to, embrace it, become more and then spread that beautiful, accepting love to the rest of the world.